| Sgt Frog Abridged - Episode 25 | |
|---|---|
|
Script hub |
|
|
Main episode article |
|
|
Previous |
|
The following is unedited from the original document except for formatting. Lines may have been rewritten during recording and/or editing.
Script
*Fade in to the sound of Shurara knocking his head against a desk*
Shurara: *Delirious* GRAAAAAAAHHH! WORST BIRTHDAY EVER! IT'S THREE MONTHS EARLY. AND SEVEN YEARS LATE. MOST OF MY SLAVES ARE DEAD, OR LOCKED UP. And now I've comPLETELY forgotten how to play the violin. *Thunder strike* DAMN YOU KEROROOOO!
*Windows fly open, big dramatic appearance of big bad blizzard boy*
Yukiki: *Sinister* We're ready, sir.
Shurara: *Eyes glowing evilly* Put 'em one ice. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA- STOP LAUGHING!
Yukiki: *Raises his head in surprise* Wha-!
*Cut to Giroro stepping out of his tent*
Giroro: *Chilled exhale, gets biffed with a snowball* BLRFFLGHAGHN. *Shakes it off, growls*
Keroro: *Proudly* Hah-hahaha! Score one for Team Tim! Where there's no “i” in- CRAP.
Tamama: *Breathing nasally and intense in the background* I before E, except after C YOU IN HELL!
Giroro: AGH- *Enunciated* BLRFFLGHAGHN. Uhh...! What the hell?! What kind of cold snaps do you get in Japan?!
Keroro: *Annoyed* Wait, it snowed?! We spent all night making these from freezer crust!
Tamama: *Through clenched teeth* They taste like something hilarious!
*Giroro turns to Natsumi and Fuyuki*
Natsumi: *Casual but matter-of-fact* Well? Times like these... I really wish I had pants.
Giroro: Do you never get snow...?
Natsumi: *Points up* Well yeah, but usually so does everyone else.
Giroro: Oh my god?!
Fuyuki: We got humped and dumped by one cloud.
Tamama: *Through clenched teeth, slightly in the distance* LIKE A VIRGIN BEEP BEEP.
Natsumi: It's more likely the idiots did their idiot rain dance, Fuyuki.
Keroro: *Angry, yelling* Hey! We're not invading anymore! You can't keep blaming us for everything!
Tamama: Guys, shut up! I'm getting signals! *Blinks, eyes static over, static comes out of mouth*
*Natsumi jumps out, Tamama can be heard cycling through show themes – Full House, Low Rider, Family Matters, COPS*
Natsumi: I'll stop when you get your planet-destroying shit out from under our house.
Keroro: Can you lift our entire base?
Yukiki: *Confidently* I can.
*Everyone makes a shocked noise and turns to look at him*
Yukiki: *Quickly, to himself* ...I hope you don't want me to prove that...
Keroro: AAAAGH!! The bowling pin's talking! That's worse than a mime!!!
Natsumi: *Annoyed, holding head, kinda whiny* God. How many of them are there?
Giroro: Twenty too many.
Yukiki: *Deadpan* There was ten of us.
Giroro: Did I stutter?!
Keroro: Did Shurara send you, square eyes?
Yukiki: A) Rude. B) Yes. C) ...
*Yukiki's legs pop up out of the ground*
Yukiki: *Announcing* Master of ice and snow! Freeze off-er of your butt! I am Yukikiiii!
Giroro: Kids! Get inside for like... one minute.
Fuyuki: Yep.
Yukiki: *Fires an ice wind* Make it twooo!
*Giroro's gun freezes up.*
Giroro: Oh.
*Cut to Yukiki on the roof*
Yukiki: Ha-ha-haaah! That may have worked on Putata, but I have actual combat experience!
Keroro: *Louder* Is that why you have a missile in your face?
Yukiki: ...WHOA. WHOA. That's fucking personal!
*Camera pans up Keroro*
Yukiki: If we're gonna go there, why don't you tell us whose star that really is? Sergeant?!
Keroro: It's mine, Snowballs! I stole it, fair and FUCK!
Yukiki: Indeed. From who, I wonder? *Calling out, dramatic and vengeful* Who was that commanding officer you left to die on planet Fukitsculdere, after you landed a toilet balloon on him? Whose very soul melted into the snow while you walked away with his job?!
Keroro: *Awkward pause* ...I'll buy a vowel.
Yukiki: It's me, you fucknut!!!
Keroro: That's not a vowel.
Yukiki: ARGH! *Literally steaming with rage, thinking to himself* This idiot's reign of destruction ends today! *Jumps down, shouting out* That's enough! You will never harm another poor soul again!
*Kululu appears from under the firepit*
Kululu: Alright I'm here. What'd I miss.
Giroro: I'll tell you later. Please end this.
Kululu: Yep.
*Fires sun gun, immediately vaporizes Yukiki*
Yukiki: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!
*Yukiki is just a puddle, hat falls with a thunk, complete silence otherwise. Keroro and Tamama lie on the ground burnt, Tamama has static eyes again. Envelope floats down onto Keroro's head.*
Keroro: Ehnh. ...What...?
*Opens envelope, slip only says “We will all have our revenge”*
Keroro: OH NO!!! *Hyperventilates as he runs to his room*
Giroro: HEY! Just how many people you've killed are coming back to waste our time?!
Keroro: *Throwing shit out of a box in a panic* Where is it? Where is it?! *Relieved, cheery* A-ha! All the death certificates I've gotten of other soldiers. *Looks at the cards, tosses them away as he finishes reading them* Okay, frozen in the tundra, check. Called him a nerd and he blew up, that could be anybody. Beat him in a staring contest, never forgave me...? Mekeke- what the hell, I only shared a burrito with him! “Threw shade on him”?! *Stands up and yells* What the fuck are these people?!
*Goes to the computer*
Keroro: Ugh, well if Shurara isn't one of them, maybe I can find... “Fuckeroro.edu”? There are forums about me?! Top user, ShuRockAndRoll72. #2 is Mekeke, 3 is Yukiki, 4 is- ...Kululu, you fucker!
*Reading* “Keroro burnt down the post office.” “Keroro smells like bleach.” “Keroro went black and went back.” Only one of those is true!
*Reading with more attention* “That's nothing. Keroro stole my mother and my father-...” *Pregnant pause* Oh fucking come on...
*Skype tune*
Viper: Yeeeeesss.
Keroro: Dad, it's me.
Viper: Nooooo.
Keroro: Too bad. Dad, Dororo and I...a-and Grandma aren't your only kids, are we.
Viper: Oh, invariably.
Keroro: ...Specifics, please...?
Viper: Dude I don't keep count. I think someone made a list somewhere online. What's the site... “Ifuckedviper.gov”.
*Keroro types it out, shows 1345657*
Keroro: GOD.
Viper: That's it? Ngh alright.
Keroro: *Flatly* Ctrl + F, ...Shurara... *Gets sweaty and slightly worried* Yep... There he is. *Dumbfounded* ...That's his mom.
Viper: Wow. I don't remember fucking them.
Keroro: Do you ever?
Viper: I have a photographic memory oh god nevermind it's coming back AAAAGHLRGHAGHLAGHAAA- *Hangs up*
*Keroro sits down, plops over on his side*
Keroro: *Sighing* Ugh... “We will all have our revenge”, huh? And for once it might not actually be my fault. *Turns the card over* Oh what? “...Directions to your new mansion. You're a wiener.” Alright, how stupid do you think I-
Dororo: *Transition of him tied to a kite* He's really stupid-!
*Cut to the platoon looking at the mansion and poking their heads out of the bushes*
Giroro: ...Oh wow, I thought it'd just be a bouncy castle.
Keroro: *Whiny* Man, me too... *Opens door, peaks in, calls out* Hello? If anyone's on heroin, stay where you are!
Dororo: The house is empty, Keroro!
Keroro: Ah whatever, let's get my throne set up- *trapdoor opens* OH GOD *bounces down the stairs, Yoshi improvs as Keroro goes through chaos, including an elephant and Raiden pretending to be an elephant, before flying through the door into the basement. Naked Raiden flies out after him.*
*Lights activate, the rest of the platoon arrives*
Tamama: Sarge, get up. How'd you do all that with your mouth?
Keroro: *Delirious* WHO?!
Kagege: Good, you got our message.
Dororo and Giroro: Huh?!
Kululu: Heeeegh?
Keroro: Yes, and I'm very offended!
Kagege: You fell into our trap quite willingly. I'd almost think you want to atone for all of the pain you've caused. Killing Yukiki, killing... everyone else in the Corps. And worst of all, calling me a wiener in front of my mom.
Tamama: Ah! Sarge!
Keroro: Eh?!
*Kagege appears from Keroro's shadow*
Kagege: I have hidden from embarrassment for so long that I've become the shade! I am Kagege!
Kululu: “Starchy”, more like.
Keroro: *Commanding* Alright, Shittier Dororo. How do you wanna die again?
Kagege: I'm not stupid, Keroro. *Teleports behind them*
Keroro, Tamama, Giroro: Egh?!
Kagege: I saw what you did to my colleagues. My friends! *Eye glows, spoken intense* Fighting you would be hopeless! *Activates shadow power, Calmer but sinister* So the answer is simple: I'll have you do the fighting for me.
Keroro: *Shrugging* Well if you want. Who wants me to punch them first?
Giroro: *Realizes something's behind him* Urgh?! I don't think that's what he means!
*Shadows walk up laughing in reverse. Shadow Keroro is a toilet flushing, it attacks Keroro*
Giroro: *Readying his gun* Heads up! They don't make sense!
Shadow Giroro: *Reverse-garbled* Whoa now, Telula.
*The two fight briefly, explosion, cut to Shadow Dororo*
Shadow Dororo: *Reverse-garbled* Knives to meet cleaver!
Dororo: What- what's happening?
*Smash cut to Natsumi hanging up wet clothes*
Natsumi: *Yelling into the house* For the last time, Fuyuki! It's not a “wet suit”, and you don't scuba dive in the sink!
Fuyuki: I found gold!
Natsumi: It's a sponge! ...Huh?
Fuyuki: I found typhoid!
Pururu: Avon calling! *Drops down*
Natsumi: *Surprised* Ah!
Pururu: Ah no wait, you already heard that one. How you doing kiddo? Man, did you know they're selling cow kidneys at the book shop? I had that exact idea five years ago! Yeah, they were frog kidneys, but give 'em a few years, they smell the same.
Natsumi: ...Who are you?!
Pururu: Me.
Natsumi: ...Hi, Pururu.
Pururu: 'Eyyyy. Oh yeah! Sorry, you didn't recognize me, did you? I've been undercover as one yous since Garuru. *Starts rubbing her face in glee* Humans are so soft on the outside!
Natsumi: *Awkwardly, slightly to herself* Please stay away from my family...
Fuyuki: *Yelling from inside* Whirlpool! *Turns on garbage disposal* AAAAAGH-
*Cut immediately back to the shadow fight, with Kagege observing*
Shadow Giroro: I'll pinch your cheeks!
Tamama and Shadow Tamama: *Singing* Didn't wanna meet a maneater, SHAAAARK ATTACK!
Dororo: I never punched a donkey, you- agh!
Shadow Dororo: You did, and you liked it.
Giroro: Well, it seems neither of us can shoot.
Kululu: Mine's in the corner foaming at the mouth.
Shadow Kululu: *In reverse* HGGGGHCHCHCHLLLLLGH...
Dororo: Honey, just take out the lights.
Giroro: Oh. *Shoots out the lights*
Shadow Kululu, Giroro and Tamama: *Reversed* NOOOOOoooooo...
Kagege: *Annoyed, to himself* Ugh... poopy diaper doodies... *Cut to him tied up* ACK-!
Keroro: *Whispering, dramatically and super mean* ...Weiner.
Kagege: *Sobs loudly*
Keroro: *Calling out Shurara, fed up with all the bullshit* Any more asses you want us to kick?! Or are you finally gonna let us kick yours?!
Shurara: *Calmly furious* I know you, Keroro. *Clay statues appear* I don't expect you to remember why I'm here. *Dissolves through the painting* You're kinda stupid.
Keroro: Look! Whatever Viper did to you, that's not on me. He abandoned me too. But I'm sick of your shit, so you're still gonna die.
Dororo: Wait- Viper?
Shurara: NO! Mother never lied to me. Mother doesn't know how to lie! *Ominous Joriri ghost voice comes wafting in* No- I know! Mother I know! I'm doing it! JUST LET ME KILL HIM!!
*Clay dolls spiral into a tube, roof explodes, Shurobobo stands up*
Shurobobo: SHUROBOBO RAISING THE ROOF... WHERE DID YOU PUT IT?!
Shurara: All those years you taught me... make others die for you. DOESN'T WORK! If I'm gonna make you proud, I HAVE TO DO IT MYSELF.
Keroro: *Posturing* Hey, we kicked Gigantor's ass last time, we're happy to do it again!
*Robots shoot out, team assembles*
Keroro: Aww yeah! Toys are back in bound!
Kululu: Also took me three hours.
Keroro: Platoon, form up!
Kululu, Giroro, Tamama, Dororo: Roger!
*Group form suck robot again, fires boosters at Shurobobo*
Keroro: There's a party in your FACE!
*Attacks and sends flying*
Keroro: Thanks for inVITING US!
*Kicks to the sky*
Keroro: You did a great job ruining our LIVES!
*Knock Shurobobo to the ground, robot lands*
Keroro: But at least kicking your ass is FUNNY!
Shurara: *Laughing quietly, building up psychotically*
Shurobobo: Ha-ha.
Shurara: YOUR LIFE?! *BWOING* GRAAAAAGH!!!
Shurobobo: INSERT STD. *Drill attack*
Keroro: AAAAGH!!
Shurara: Do I have to tell you about your life?! My mother... happy to abandon me to go help you! Our father... happy to reconnect with you! While I'm stuck throwing birds into a lake!
Dororo: Keroro, please tell me he didn't say “our father”!
Giroro: Oh come on! Is the robot a relative?!
Shurobobo: I'M AN IN-LAW.
Shurara: He made me go to a wedding in socks and a chain wallet!
Keroro: *Defensive* Viper fucked a hobo! You can't blame me for that!
Joriri: *Ghostlike wafting in* I used to find 'em, and kill 'em.
Shurara: You heard him, Keroro. *Eyes glow* Mother's orders.
*Shurobobo shield smashes the mech, Keroro lies knocked out on the ground*
Shurara: *Laughing to himself* I did it, Mom. I ended his life like a sea urchin! *Checks pulse, heart beating at some weird musical rhythm* No... NO!!! *Peels off star like a very sticky bandaid*
Keroro: *Eye pops open, bloodshot* FUUUUUUUUUUU-hoohoohoohoohoohoohoohoohook!!
Giroro: Oh yeah! That's how you gave me my scar, you dick!
Shurara: *Laughing like he's losing his everloving shit*
Tamama: Oh labia!
Shurara: What am I doing wrong?! *Breaking down* Why's nothing I do working?! He won't... fucking... What...? *Holds out the star*
Joriri: When you wish upon a star, you will burst into flames. True story.
Shurara: *Quietly giddy* Heh-heh-heh-heh...! That's it...! Of course! I was never supposed to kill you! *Closeup* I'm supposed to become you.
Tamama: Hm. Kinky.
Keroro: *Baffled and trying to figure out what the fuck is up with Shurara* Wha...? Eh?! Uh...
Dororo: Trust us, fella, you won't make it through the trash in the bedroom!
Kululu: *Crunch sound as he turns*
Shurara: Hahaha! I won't need to! I'll eat my way through it! *Inside the robot* Everything of Keroro's – I must consume!
Keroro: *Pissy and childish, to himself* Tch, fucker took my star... *Shurara blasts off* AGH!
Kululu, Tamama, Giroro, Dororo: AGH!
*Cut to the house*
Natsumi: *Cheerful* Thanks for the snack... that you're conspicuously not eating.
Pururu: Keronians don't believe in Potassium. Just pot ass.
Fuyuki: Explains a lot.
Mois: There's a party in my mouth, and I've killed everyone!
*House explodes*
Natsumi: Mois! Stop having parties in your mouth!
Shurara: Er- what did I miss?
Fuyuki: Whoa...
Natsumi: Hey! Only the roof, asshole!
Shurara: *Threatens her* Silence! You will speak to me correctly. I am your new Keroro.
Natsumi: ERGH- *Furious* ...THEN GO CLEAN UP THE MESS YOU MADE!
Shurara: *Triumphantly* Usted es un iglesia! *You are a church* *Panting, chuckling slightly* This would be easier... if I didn't.... chop off my hands!
Fuyuki: Don't forget the Downy, or Keroro will-
Keroro: *Shouting from the sky* YOU SON OF A BITCH! AAAAAARGH!
Fuyuki: Oh now you've done it.
*Keroro crotch slams the mech into Shurobobo. Place gets covered in dust*
Mois, Pururu, Natsumi, Fuyuki: Ah! *Coughing*
Keroro: *Quickly and panicking* Hey guys, love what you've done with the place, WHERE IS HE?!
Shurara: *Emerging from the laundry* A-ha! Ahora soy el rey de la ropa interiorrrragh!
Keroro: HE'S STEALING MY THRONE! NOOOOOOOO- AGH! *Slips on the star like a banana peel, quietly and contemplatively* My star... No, it was never mine... I never earned you. If Shurara takes you from me, will it really be such a loss...? *Star opens up, high-pitched gasp* You accept me?!
Shurara: Não!
Keroro: I promise! I will be the sergeant I always should have- oh crap! *misses grabbing it*
Dororo: Ah damnit! *Jumps up after the star*
Shurara: Other brother.
Dororo: Agh!
Shurara: *Fighting* Hagh! To be honest, you seem like a great guy! But Keroro wouldn't care!
Dororo: He would've before you showed up! *Stab* UUUuuuugh...!
Shurara: *Stab* Don't lie to yourself!*Star floats on* For Mooooom~!
Pururu: *Jumping into his way* Back it up, party cart!
Shurara: Aoop?!
Pururu: Unless you can rock like a Cessna, ain't nobody takin' Keroro's place!
Shurara: Who the...? You weren't in the Tic-Tac-Toe of hate...? Am I supposed to hate you, I don't-!
Keroro: Traveling!
Shurara: DAMNIT! Why do these people care about you?! *Fires electricity*
Keroro: *Standing there screaming like a fuckhead* AERGHAERERREARGH!
*Pururu jumps in the way, gets electrocuted*
Pururu: *Grunting, pained like you're being electrocuted because you are and it fucking hurts* Ergh- ugh! *Gets flung back* AAAAGH! *Pururu transforms back into a Keronian, flies back into Keroro* Oof! *Groaning in pain*
Keroro: Ah?! OOF! Urgh... *Pained* Sorry, but I'm trying harder with Tamama.
Shurara: Pururu...? Mijn geliefde...!
Keroro: I didn't leaf nothing, mang!
*Flashback*
Lil' Pururu: A-ha-ha-ha-ha! A-ha-ha-ha-ha! A-ha-ha-ha-ha! A-ha-ha-ha-ha!
Shurara: You were the only person to treat me with kindness while at the same time breathing.
Lil' Pururu: *Holding up Lil' Shurara's injured hand* Sorry I threw a daawg at ya. Here's a token of my fivegiveness.
Shurara: *Amorous* I finally understood true love! *Angry* AND NOW YOU'VE TAKEN THAT FROM ME TOO!
Pururu: I can assure you, Tamama does not breathe.
Tamama: Not out of my mouth, anyway.
Shurara: Not Sputnik! Pururu is so kind. So sweet. Like the summer breeze that stole my cat. And you... why would she choose you?!
Keroro: Because I...! *Puts on the star, star shines proudly like a glorious cosmic dick, salutes proudly* Am Sergeant Keroro!
Shurara: ...We fucking know you're not!
Keroro: But you, Shurara...! *Pauses, calmer and more understanding* ...No. You know what? I know what your real problem is. *Turns and shrugs* You already are me!
Shurara: ...Que?!
Dororo: ...Que?!
Giroro: ...Kwee?!
*Cut to shot of Fuyuki and Natsumi staring confused*
Keroro: Yeah, think about it. You're an angry little loser who blames his terrible life on other people. *Cut back to Keroro* You use others to get what you want, and you don't care who you hurt in the process. *Getting more serious as Keroro realizes that it really is all his fault* But in the end, all the people you hurt, all the blame you deflect, you'll just drive everyone away. And you'll be left with no one to blame but yourself.
*Keroro turns around*
Keroro: I guess what I'm trying to say is... I'm sorry, Shurara.
*Shurara is “leaking”*
Shurara: URGHRGHRGH-! ERRERRRERRREAAAAAAAAARGH!!!
Keroro: Holy-! I know I'm good, but GOD!
Tamama: Oh geesssspot.
Shurara: RRAAAAAAAAAGH!!! *Disappears into the helmet, which is now meteor-sized*
Pururu: *Worried* Oh god, I remember him now! He's the kid who leaked in class!
*Shurara's head is gigantic*
Keroro: I am never apologizing ever again!!!
Giroro: What the hell is happening to him?!
Tamama: Weight Watchers!!
Kululu: *Intense* His guilt chromosomes are seething with energy. He's become a being of pure self-loathing.
Keroro: *Fast* WHATDOWEDO?! *Normal, proud and kinda douchey* Save the day, of course!
*Cut to them in the mechs lifting the head into the sky*
Dororo: Get him as far away from the city as possible! AGH!
*Shurara head swipes vines around*
Shurara head: OH MOMMY!!! WHYYYYYYYY?!?!
Keroro: *Quickly, grimacing, trying not to get hit* Still hate you for putting me outside!
Kululu: *Quickly, vibrating* You'll be fi-i-i-i-i-i-ne, I've got a se-e-e-cret we-e-e-apo-o-on!
Keroro: *Head goes careening into the ground* Is it gravityyyYYYYYYYY?!?!?! *Crash*
Kululu: ...Maybe...?
*Cut to robot launching, cut back to the reveal of the head planted on the ground with vines, holds up the platoon getting crushed*
Keroro: *Freaking out* SHURARA! YOU'VE GOT A NOSE HAIR PROBLEM!
Shurara head: NOOOO I'M A LIVING LANDFIIIILL!! *Toss*
Keroro: OOOOOH BAAAAAAAALLS! *Crash into a cliffside* Agh! *Ocelot falls on his head*
Liquid Ocelot: MACaroons!
Shurara head: Look what you've done. I will do with your life what I did to your house: burn it to the ground. *Fires laser*
Keroro: AAAAAAAAAAAAaaaoh come on. Eh...?
*Kerobobo revealed*
Kerobobo: Cape set to handsome. Body set to righteous. What this party needs is an ass kicking.
Keroro: ...Are you fucking me.
Giroro: Oh... god. What am I looking at?
Kululu: *Sinister cackling, proud shot of Kerobobo* Shurara didn't look like he was using Robobo anymore. *Deadpan* So I tore him apart and made this. *Clicks a button, teleports them into the robot*
Kerobobo: Make my insides froggeh!
Keroro: *Appears in his seat, quick sharp laugh* AGH! *Robot posing awesomeness* Alriiight! Shurara, your cheeks are about to get pinched!
Fuyuki: *Pumped the fuck up* Yeah, Sarge! Rip his head off! ...I'm dumb!
Pururu: *Calling out, worried* Keroro, wait! I don't think he's in control! He doesn't have any natural talents. It all comes from the helmet!
Dororo: Then the helmet's doing all of this? Ready the scanner, I have an idea!
Kerobobo: Scanning for losers!
Dororo: Hmm, she might be right. I think he's trapped deep inside.
Keroro: Alright, platoon! This is probably all my fault, so let's fix my fuckups how we always do: together!
*Super saiyan I guess robot crashes into the helmet, flies through*
Kerobobo: May your sinuses forever be quenched!
Keroro: Find us a clear way through, Kululu!
Kululu: Uh yeah about that-
*Kerobobo immediately gets grabbed*
Keroro: *Angry, through gritted teeth* Thanks, you're great at your job!
Kerobobo: Blocked, disliked and flagged!
Dororo: Keroro! Emergency Plan “Papercut Extreme!”
Keroro: *Slightly panicked* I don't speak your moon language, Dororo-! *button appears* Oh, I get it. *Smashes hand into glass* YEEEOW!
*Kerobobo splits into separate parts for each Keronian*
Keroro: *Giddy* Wow! Look at our cool shit! Thanks, Jesus!
Tamama: Thanks for NOTHING!
Kerobobos: *Multiple voices* You're welcome!
Giroro: Keroro, you get Shurara out of there! *Intense* Flailing is my job. FLAIL BARRAGE!
Dororo: Hope they like my anniversary present!
Kululu: Shurara's a straight shot ahead.
Keroro: I'm on it! *Blasts boosters* WOOOOOOOOOOOO! *Enters the core* Shurara! Wake up! *To himself* Whoa. Some genes ain't dominant, huh?
*Keroro pulls Shurara out of the wall*
Keroro: Let's get you out there and get you a wife. *Helmet starts rumbling, more tentacles reach out* AH?!
Shurara head: NO MORE WEDDIIIIINGS!
*Keroro blasts out of the helmet*
Pururu: It's a Hanukkah miracle!
Keroro: *Thumbs up* Hegh hegh you too, Pururu!
*The rest burst through the schnoz*
Keroro: Platoon, form up!
Tamama: Hehyeah!
Giroro: Whatever.
Kululu: Alright.
Dororo: Yeah.
*Star form, fuse into Kerobobo*
Kerobobo: Ready for more football!
Keroro, Kululu, Giroro, Dororo, Tamama: Keroro Platoon, Flail Barrage!
*Slices a star into the helmet*
Shurara head: AT LAAAAAST! I'M A STAAAAAAR! *Explodes*
Mois, Natsumi, Fuyuki: *Cheering*
*Pururu stabs Shurara in the ass, his head is a realistic snake head*
Shurara: AH! ...Ah.... Pururu?
Pururu: *In her mind* Yep, still a loser.
*Cut to sunset*
Shurara: I'm sorry, Keroro. For everything. You were right, I should never have blamed you for anything my mother did, or our father.
Keroro: Hey, don't worry about it. Only like two or three hard feelings.
Pururu: I'll bring him with me back to Keron. We'll figure out what to do with the little freak from there.
Shurara: I'm a big freak.
Keroro: You're gonna be alright?
Shurara: I'll need like a decade of counseling and a gallon of lithium, but yeah. What about you?
Keroro: *Cheerful* I think I've faced enough inner demons to last a lifetime. I'm fresh out of problems!
Natsumi: AHEM!
Keroro: Ooh?! *Turns and sees Natsumi seething with rage* SERIOUSLY! YOU CAN'T BLAME ME FOR THE HOUSE!
Fuyuki: Yeah but you left the laundry out.
Giroro: I'm betting you'll turn back into a shit in a week.
Tamama: Two days, double or nothing.
Dororo: Come on, guys. Keroro's already worked through his bag of bullshit twice now. As long as we don't let him out of our sight, I think he can handle another chance.
Kululu: *Starts dancing* Unce unce unce unce unce unce.
*Shot of Pururu's ship flying away*
Keroro: Yeah! Thanks, Broradorbo!
Dororo: ...Maybe Shurara was right.
Keroro: *Sharp laugh* Ah!
Keroro: *Narrating* And thus concluded our stupid adventures. Everyone on Keron forgot about us, finally. At last, I could put all of the terrible shit I did behind me. And no one ever came to hunt me down out of revenge ever again. EVER.
Pururu: Man. If that's how you guys turned out, who knows what happened to his twin.
Shurara: ...Who?
*Credits*
Keroro: *Flirty* So, Hun. What do you think of my new sensitive side?
Tamama: You turned my hoo-haw into an uh-oh, that's what.
Giroro: Hey babe, what do you think of my new sensitive side?
Dororo: Darling, you cried at the end of Terminator. It's not new.
Kululu: *Watching the guinea pig video from SFA3* I'm very alone.
Natsumi: Are we having fjord yet?
Fuyuki: It's “fun”. It's what you do when you enjoy yourself.
Natsumi: Which is it, Fuyuki?!
Aki: *Sits awkwardly, looks around, smacks her lips* Yeah...
Momoka: I never want to hear the name “Fuyuki” again...
Paul: Who, Fuyuki?! *Explosion in the distance*
Koyuki: Oh. Well back to living in the forest.
Momoka: *Deadpan* You're fired.
Paul: Mghaw.
Mois: *Talking to her dad on the phone* Hey, Daddy! ...Oh yeah, I did that years ago. I don't know what I do here either!
HQ: *Weak and under the breath* Uuuuggggggggghhhh-my own heartbeat hurts-uuuuuuuuggggghhh-
Pururu: 4 out of 5 doctors say smoking is bad for you. The fifth doctor can't speak 'cause he has throat cancer. I'm a field medic, so no one FUCKIN' LISTENS TO ME.
Viper: Well, the secret's out! The pirate treasure I've been hoarding is booty!
Putata: Putatoo good to live! The afterlife is aftertight! Corn cobs everywhere!
Mekeke: AAAAAAAAGH-
Dokuku: I wish they put a chair in here. I can't feel my legs.
Giruru: ...This is why you're dead.
Kerobobo: Finally! My friends acknowledge that they're my friends!
Nuii: *Clip of Todd killing her*
Gyororo: You know? I always thought I was good with kids. I have a knack for making their dolls kill people.
Yukiki: *Clip of Thorn stomping into a puddle*
Kagege: *Sobbing, shot of the mansion* Not a wiener!
Shurara: The air is so much fresher now. The wind blows cooler. The flowers smell sweeter. The road stretching out in front me...actually visible...since I don't have my head squeezed into a fucking helmet.
*Thanks and apologies list*
Snake: O, do not forsake me, my indolent friends
Raiden: O, do not forsake me though you know I must spend
Young and Revolver Ocelot: All my darkest hours talking like this
Liquid Ocelot: For I am one thousand years old
Altogether: One thousand years old/Sure, you think that's old/One thousand years old/But what do you know?/In my darkest hour I'm talking like this
Old Snake: For I am one thousand years old
Raiden: You're a dirty old bitch, hahahahaha!
Cyborg Raiden: JACK'S BACK! AAAAAAAAAAAAA!! *Eats the camera*
Snakes, Ocelots, Raiden: AAAAAAAAGH!